A year ago Joe passed away. It broke my heart but some things you just have no control over. Funny how things happen in your life, and people come into your life for a very short time, but make a huge impact on you.
TJ and Joe were brothers, not by blood, but by heart and soul. I met TJ through a game on facebook. He was fighting his way through stage 4 leukemia when I met him, and I only knew him for a few short weeks. But we got to be good friends, and spent many a sleepless night sharing our stories with each other, helping each other make it thru the dark times, until the sunlight showed up and we went on with our regular lives.
One day, while TJ went for chemo, he left his laptop signed into facebook. His friend Joe sent me a message, introducing himself and thanking me for being TJ’s friend. Until then, I didn’t even know Joe existed. He was TJ’s best friend, brother, and caregiver. He had moved into TJ’s home in order to look after him. For the next couple of weeks, the three of us spend a lot of hours on the computer together, chatting, crying, and laffing together. Joe was a pilot for Flights for Life, and when he got called out on an emergency, I would be left to “babysit” TJ. Because of Joe, I was able to “be” at TJ’s bedside when he breathed his last breath. Because of Joe, I was able to say a final goodbye to TJ. Because of TJ, Joe and I became good friends. I had made a promise that I would do my best to help Joe throught the inevitable depression that would follow. I kept that promise to the best of my ability. I can’t even begin to explain the rollercoaster ride that followed TJ’s death on December 22, 2011. Joe lost his mother 4 days later, when she had a stroke and fell down a flight of stairs. Then on new year’s eve, Joe went to the mountains, to fulfill a promise he had made to TJ. He ended up passing out in the snow because of a diabetic coma, and wasn’t found for a few hours. After returning home, Joe suffered from pneumonia and more problems with his diabetes and ended up hospitalized. He never came home from the hospital. A month later, Joe joined his mother and his brother in Heaven.
Joe had the biggest heart in the world. All he wanted was to make a difference, to be able to help people. When he found out he couldn’t do that anymore, he gave up on life. He felt there was nothing left for him here. He didn’t kill himself. He just chose not to live anymore.
I often wonder why these two men were brought into my life, or me theirs. I still cry when I think about them. I do know that I now have two Texas angels looking after me every day though.
Before he died, Joe sent me an email, containing a story he had written. It’s a beautiful story. And today, on the anniversary of his first year in Heaven, I want to share this story. I’m not going to change a word. I’m going to copy and paste it exactly the way Joe sent it to me. Maybe, just maybe, Joe can go on touching people’s lives a little more!
BENTLEY THE BEAR
ONCE UPON A TIME, IN THE DEEP PINEY WOODS, THERE LIVED A BIG BLACK GRIZZLY BEAR, BENTLEY WAS HIS NAME. NOW, BENTLEY WAS NOT YOUR AVERAGE GRIZZLY BEAR. NO SIR. BENTLEY WAS QUITE DIFFERENT FROM ALL THE OTHER BEARS THAT LIVED IN FREEMAN’S FOREST. POOR OLD BENTLEY WAS BALD. NOT ONE HAIR WAS ON TOP OF HIS HEAD. WHAT A TERRIBLE MISFORTUNE FOR THE BIGGEST GRIZZLEY BEAR IN THE FOREST. NONE OF THE OTHER FOREST ANIMALS RESPECTED BENTLEY BECAUSE OF HIS BALD HEAD. INSTEAD OF BEING AFRAID OF BENTLEY, THEY WOULD LAUGH AND MAKE FUN OF HIM. ESPECIALLY LEON THE LION. ANYTIME LEON WOULD SEE BENTLEY, HE WOULD YELL, “HEY BALDY”. THE OTHER FOREST CREATURES WOULD STAND BY LAUGHING AS LEON PRANCED AROUND BENTLEY. AS TEARS WELLED UP IN BENTLEY’S EYES, HE WOULD TURN AND RUN AND HIDE IN HIS CAVE. THERE HE WOULD SIT AND CRY UNTIL ALL THE OTHER ANIMALS HAD GONE AWAY.
ONE DAY, BENTLEY DECIDED HE WAS TIRED OF BEING PICKED ON, AND LAUGHED AT, SO HE RAN AWAY FROM HIS DEN. WALKING FOR DAYS THROUGH THE DARK FOREST, BENTLEY WOULD ONLY STOP LONG ENOUGH TO CATCH SOME RAINBOW TROUT OR ROB A TREE OF ITS HONEY. BENTLEY WOULD NOT STOP FOR VERY LONG, BECAUSE HE WAS ON A MISSION. WHEN BENTLEY WAS JUST A BABY BEAR CUB, HIS MOTHER TOLD HIM STORIES ABOUT A HUGE PINE TREE IN THE MIDDLE OF FREEMAN’S FOREST WHICH GRANTED WISHES. IT WAS A VERY SPECIAL PINE TREE AND BENTLEY KNEW IF HE COULD JUST FIND THIS TREE, ALL HIS TROUBLES WOULD GO AWAY. THIS PINE TREE HAD THE POWER TO GRANT WISHES, BUT ONLY IF YOUR HEART WAS IN THE RIGHT PLACE AND YOU TRULY DESERVED THEM. ON THE FIFTH DAY OF BENTLEY’S JOURNEY, HE FINALLY FOUND THE WISHING PINE TREE. HE LOOKED UP AND SAW THE TALLEST, FULLEST, AND GREENEST PINE TREE HE HAD EVER SEEN IN HIS LIFE. TO MAKE HIS WISH COME TRUE, HE WOULD HAVE TO WALK AROUND THE TRUNK OF THE TREE THREE TIMES BACKWARDS. THEN HE HAD TO KNOCK ON THE TRUNK OF THE TREE TWICE, AND WITH HIS EYES CLOSED HE WOULD THEN HAVE TO REPEAT HIS WISH OUTLOUD. BENTLEY WAS SO EXCITED HE COULDN’T WAIT TO BEGIN. AS HE BEGAN TO WALK BACKWARDS, HE CIRCLED THE TREE ONCE AND THEN BEFORE HE COULD COMPLETE HIS SECOND LAP, BENTLEY TRIPPED AND FELL DOWN. LOOKING TO SEE WHAT HAD CAUSED HIS FALL, HE NOTICED A LITTLE GREY RABBIT HAD GOTTEN IN HIS WAY. REACHING DOWN TO HELP THE FURRY RABBIT UP, BENTLEY RECOGNIZED HIS BEST BUDDY, RODNEY. OF ALL THE ANIMALS IN FREEMAN’S FOREST, RODNEY WAS BENTLEY’S VERY BEST FRIEND. RODNEY TOLD BENTLEY HE WAS FOLLOWING HIM BECAUSE HE WAS CURIOUS TO KNOW WHAT BENTLEY WAS DOING SO FAR AWAY FROM HOME. RODNEY HAD NEVER LAUGHED OR TEASED BENTLEY BECAUSE OF HIS BALD HEAD, BECAUSE HE KNEW BENTLEY WAS A GENTLE BEAR WITH MANY FINE QUALITIES THAT WERE MORE IMPORTANT THAN ANY OUTWARD APPEARANCES.
AS BENTLEY STOOD THERE HOLDING RODNEY IN HIS PAWS, RODNEY ASKED BENTLEY WHAT HE WAS DOING AT THE WISHING PINE TREE. BENTLEY APOLOGIZED FOR STEPPING ON RODNEY AND TRIED TO EXPLAIN HOW MUCH HE WANTED TO BE LIKE ALL THE REST OF THE BLACK GRIZZLY BEARS IN FREEMAN’S FOREST. RODNEY LOOKED AT BENTLEY WITH SADDNESS IN HIS EYES, BUT HE WAS TO TIRED AND WEAK TO TALK BENTLEY OUT OF MAKING THIS BIG MISTAKE. WHEN BENTLEY ASKED RODNEY WHY HE THOUGHT MAKING HIS WISH WAS WRONG, RODNEY EXPLAINED THAT GOD HAD MADE BENTLEY JUST THE WAY HE WAS FOR A SPECIAL REASON, AND BENTLEY SHOULD NOT TRY AND CHANGE HIS LOOKS. BENTLEY TOLD RODNEY THAT, HE BEING A PERFECT FURRY GREY RABBIT JUST WOULD NOT UNDERSTAND HOW HORRIBLE IT WAS TO BE A BALD GRIZZLY BEAR, WHICH EVERYBODY TEASED AND LAUGHED AT. BENTLEY PUT RODNEY DOWN UNDER ANOTHER PINE TREE, AND BEFORE RODNEY COULD SAY ANOTHER WORD, BENTLEY HAD BEGUN WALKING BACKWARDS AROUND THE WISHING PINE TREE ONCE AGAIN. AFTER COMPLETING HIS THIRD LAP AND CLOSING HIS EYES TIGHT, BENTLEY KNOCKED ON THE TRUNK OF THE PINE TREE TWICE AND ROARED OUT, “I WISH I HAD HAIR ON THE TOP OF MY BALD HEAD!” IMMEDIATELY , THICK BLACK HAIR BEGAN TO GROW ON BENTLEY’S HEAD. BENTLEY GRABBED RODNEY AND SWUNG HIM AROUND. BENTLEY WAS SO HAPPY AND EXCITED THAT HIS WISH HAD BEEN GRANTED HE COULD HARDLY WAIT TO RETURN TO FREEMAN’S FOREST AND SHOW ALL THE OTHER FOREST ANIMALS HIS NEW HAIR.
BENTLEY WAS EAGER TO GO HOME, SO HE BEGAN RUNNING AND POOR LITTLE RODNEY HAD TROUBLE KEEPING UP WITH HIS FRIEND. RODNEY GROWING TIRED FAILED TO SEE A HOLE IN THE GROUND AND TUMBLED HEAD FIRST INTO THE HOLE. BENTLEY HEARD HIS LITTLE BUDDIES CRIES FOR HELP AND RAN BACK TO SEE WHAT HAD HAPPENED. ALTHOUGH THE HOLE WAS WIDE AT THE OPENING, IT BECAME NARROW AT THE BOTTOM. BENTLEY REALIZED THAT BECAUSE OF HIS NEWLY GROWN THICK BLACK HAIR, HE WOULD NOT BE ABLE TO HELP HIS BUDDY AND DEAREST FRIEND RODNEY. EACH TIME BENTLEY TRIED TO REACH DOWN IN THE HOLE FOR RODNEY, HIS HAIR WOULD FALL DOWN OVER HIS EYES, AND HE COULD NOT SEE. AS RODNEY WAS LYING HELPLESS AND SCARED IN THE BOTTOM OF THE HOLE HE BEGAN TO CRY. BENTLEY WAS FILLED WITH SHAME. IF BENTLEY HAD ONLY LISTENED TO RODNEY AT THE WISHING PINE TREE AND NOT WORRIED SO MUCH ABOUT HOW HE LOOKED, HE WOULD BE ABLE TO HELP HIS LITTLE FRIEND OUT OF THIS HOLE. BENTLEY KNEW THER WAS ONLY ONE THING LEFT TO DO. RUNNING AS FAST AS HE COULD, HE WENT BACK TO THE WISHING PINE TREE. REACHING THE TREE QUICKLY, HE WALKED BACKWARDS AROUND THE TREE THREE TIMES, ALL THE TIME BENTLEY WAS THINKING ABOUT HIS FRIEND RODNEY WHO WAS DEPENDING ON HIM TO COME BACK AND SAVE HIM. BENTLEY CLOSED HIS EYES TIGHT ONCE AGAIN, AND KNOCKED TWICE ON THE TRUNK OF THE TREE. AS IF IN PRAYER, BENTLEY PLEADINGLY ASKED TO BE BALD ONCE AGAIN. TOUCHING THE TOP OF HIS HEAD, BENTLEY KNEW HIS WISH HAD BEEN GRANTED AND HE WAS ONCE AGAIN THE BALD HEADED BLACK GRIZZLY BEAR HE WAS. WASTING NO MORE TIME BENTLEY RAN BACK TO HELP RODNEY. WHEN BENTLEY GOT BACK TO THE HOLE, HE KNEALT DOWN AND WAS NOW ABLE TO SEE WHERE HIS WEAK LITTLE FRIEND RODNEY WAS STUCK. REACHING DOWN INTO THE HOLE, BENTLEY CAREFULLY PICKED RODNEY UP AND BROUGHT HIM TO SAFETY. RODNEY CLUTCHED BENTLEY AROUND THE NECK TIGHTLY AND THANKED HIM FOR SAVING HIS LIFE. BENTLEY TOLD RODNEY NO THANKS WERE NECESSARY BECAUSE THAT IS WHAT FRIENDS ARE FOR. IT WAS NOW RODNEY, WHO COULD HARDLY WAIT TO RETURN TO FREEMAN’S FOREST. RODNEY WANTED TO SHARE THE STORY WITH ALL THE OTHER FOREST ANIMALS, ABOUT WHAT A SACRIFICE BENTLEY HAD MADE, JUST TO SAVE HIS LIFE. MUCH LIKE GOD’S SACRIFICE FOR US BY ALLOWING HIS SON TO DIE ON THE CROSS TO SAVE OUR LIVES. RODNEY RUNNING ON AHEAD OF BENTLEY, BEGAN TELLING OF THEIR GREAT ADVENTURE. RODNEY TOLD THE FOREST ANIMALS ABOUT HOW BENTLEY HAD GIVEN UP SOMETHING THAT HE HAD REALLY WANTED IN ORDER TO SAVE RODNEY FROM DANGER. WHEN BENTLEY FINALLY ARRIVED, THE ANIMALS BEGAN TO CLAP AND CHEER FOR HIM. EVEN LEON THE LION WAS PROUD OF WHAT BENTLEY HAD DONE FOR RODNEY. NO LONGER WOULD THE ANIMALS LAUGH OR TEASE BENTLEY. BENTLEY FINALLY HAD WHAT HE HAD WANTED ALL ALONG, THEIR RESPECT. IT DID NOT MATTER IF HE WAS BALD OR NOT. BENTLEY NOW HAD FRIENDS WHO CARED ABOUT HIM. RODNEY TAUGHT BENTLEY A VERY IMPORTANT LESSON: BE CONTENT WITH WHO YOU ARE AND DO NOT TRY AND BE SOMETHING YOU WERE NEVER MEANT TO BE, BECAUSE GOD MADE YOU JUST THE WAY YOU SHOULD BE. BENTLEY THE BEAR AND RODNEY THE RABBIT REMAINED BEST FRIENDS AND LIVED HAPPILY EVER AFTER IN FREEMAN’S FOREST. THE END.
JOE WELCH
I miss you TJ.
I miss you Joe.
ruth1955 